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Got dumped by the person you considered your soulmate? Got rejected at an interview to work at your dream workplace? Well, you are not alone.
At some point or another, we all have experienced rejection in our lives and there doesn’t seem to be a guaranteed end to it either. Every person from an infant to the elderly craves acceptance and healthy social relationships in society because in most cases the support they receive from being recognized is what keeps them going forward in their lives.
And when they no longer feel that they are being loved or respected as before, that is when the feelings of rejection start to hit them. Being rejected can be traumatic and also bring around a feeling of inferiority. The famous singer and songwriter, Taylor Swift advises us to “Shake it off” when we are hit with rejection.
But it is not as easy as it seems to just shake everything off, isn’t it? That is when a manual for dealing with rejection comes in handy. So don’t worry folks, we bring you the most effective tips and tricks to deal with rejection from your family, friends, lovers, and society.
Even though how we categorize rejection and the way people hurt us is different, when dealing with rejection, we have observed some general approaches that you can use to heal from the pain and sadness.
Accept it: –
When you are rejected try to accept the rejection. It must have happened due to a problem from your side or their side but do not try to question the other person desperately. Maintain calmness and remove yourself from the situation. If you try to argue and get your own way it will be very difficult for you to move on. Try to understand that rejection comes after much thought and it is not easy to change the mind of the other person. If the person to whom you declared your love rejects you accept their rejection without begging for a reason. If your parents said no to any of your choices accept it at that moment and keep calm with the idea to solve it later on.
Grieve: –
As crazy and straightforward as it sounds grieving in some way that lets you dissolve your sorrow is extremely effective when dealing with rejection. Whether you cry or scream or throw a tantrum is up to you and you will realize that letting out your emotions that way rather than holding them inside and suffering in silence will make you feel so much better. Crying until your eyes swell up will give you some bodily pain but will definitely relieve you of your deep grief. But remember self-harm is never an option in grieving.
Try to understand your emotions: –
Grieving as mentioned above is a form of unreasoned behavior. You can weep and shout when you are rejected in the first stage but when you have finished with that it is necessary to process the emotions that are making you feel rejected. This way you will be able to think deep into where you went wrong and what led you to be rejected. If you were rejected at a job interview try to find out whether it was a shortcoming in your appearance, your speech, or your qualifications. Understanding such factors will definitely calm you down and make you aware of the mistakes that caused the rejection and even bring you a new opportunity to correct yourself.
Talk to someone whom you trust:-
When you have thought everything through by yourself it will be a wise thing to share your story with someone else whom you trust completely and get them to listen and maybe also give you an opinion of their own. Remember to only talk to someone whom you are sure is nonjudgmental and supportive. For example a teacher, parents, a counselor, or a best friend. Also, keep in mind that there are many online platforms available that listen to your stories and help you deal with rejection. Some popular sites are,
www.hopequre.com
www.betterhelp.com
www.7cups.com
Stay away from memories: –
The tighter we cling to the memory of the person or the dream that rejected us the more painful the detachment will be. So staying away from it will be the hardest step to take but it will also be the most beneficial. So if you were rejected by a lover trying to cut off contact with them, do not stalk them or follow them around. If you were rejected by society for whatever reason, try to avoid those who question you and your decisions.
Practice Self-care: –
Grieving and processing your thoughts can take a while and even prevent you from taking care of yourself during that time. When you have a clear idea about what happened and how it happened, this is the best time to give your mind and body some love. Following are some tips you can follow that will be included in a proper manual for dealing with rejection.
- Take a long and soothing bath
- Clean your room and surroundings
- Treat yourself to your favorite foods and drinks
- Go on a shopping spree or watch a football match
- Get a haircut, a manicure or a relaxing massage
- Meditate or hit the gym
- Go for a walk
If you had been rejected by a partner or a job due to your looks or your personality, taking care of yourself is the best way to get over it. This will undoubtedly bring you happiness and make you believe that you are beautiful and you are strong
Get busy! : –
When you realized that you are now strong and that you need to focus on something more productive but also keep yourself, busy son, the thoughts of rejection do not spring up from time to time. For this, you can take up a new hobby like gardening, reading, dancing or singing. But it will be better if it does not remind you of anything related to your rejection. If you are in school or doing a job find new ways to make your work interesting. Clean up your office space or your locker, change your hairstyle or outfit and it will make a huge difference for sure!
It might not be your fault at all! : –
After being rejected you might feel like it happened because of you. You will feel faulty and guilty. But the rejection can also be a weakness of the other person and there could be nothing wrong with you. So dealing with rejection with the mindset that the person who treated you badly is the problem can actually help you to heal better. This does not mean to blame the other person but what was supposed to happen has happened and now you are reading this manual for dealing with rejection to overcome your sorrow and not to make anyone else feel good or bad. So think positively and be free from the idea that you were the cause of rejection.
Learn from the rejection: –
Being rejected can bring you great lessons in life. You will be able to detect rejections early and dealing with rejections in the future will be so much easier. If you were rejected from a job or a college due to a lack in your qualifications, you will need to fulfill that to not face rejection the next time. And if you were rejected due to your beliefs or culture, you can take initiative in making society aware of your identity. Learning how you were rejected and preparing yourself to face more rejections and get up strong as ever is what you should be doing.
Move forward with a positive attitude: –
By the time you have done all the above steps, it is time to move on. Yes, you were rejected. Yes, you were devastated. You tried to get back on your legs and succeeded. Rejection is always faced by someone who takes risks and follows their dreams so there is no point in holding back on the great things in your life. You need to go out and experience the better things of the world and leave the past behind. Focus on your future with a positive mindset and conquer your dreams!
There you go, winners! A manual for dealing with rejection is in your hands and now you are all equipped to chase away the worry and deal with rejection like a pro!
